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Resilience Loves...Embodied Wanting

“I really do. And I also hate it. No, just kidding, but who doesn’t get twitchy when they let themselves really want, really yearn? Putting clear words to as-yet-unspoken desire is vulnerability and risk in full flight, even to — or especially to — ourselves. Embodied want is unnerving, both a physiological event and an as-yet-unwritten story. And as such, the human body is designed to reflexively protect you from the full experience. It leaps into the fray, offering diversions and busyness. Or the mind immediately chimes in with explanations of impracticality or non-deserving. Or we jump into action in the first indicated direction without truly allowing the edgy deliciousness of the wave of pure wanting to build, peak, and resolve. And yet, supported resilience permits courage, permits experience, my darling. Which is being alive in all things.” Therefore, beloved, retreat for a moment into your bones, right now. Smile a little with your mouth and eyes, even if a little ruefully. Allow wistfulness to rise in these very bones, and see what they say to you. “I would really love…,” they whisper. “It would be magical if…” Don’t leave. Don’t stand up, don’t get distracted or start planning something productive. That would be rude. Stay and listen beautifully, as if a shy person was confiding in you. Let them finish. Meet that shy person’s gaze warmly. Mirror their gestures. Ask if there’s anything else to add.

When they finish, nod your head, and tell them, “That sounds just amazing. I want this for you too. Or something even better.”

Now, feel any waves of responses as they pass through your body.

You’ve got this. I love you.

“People who want clearly are dangerous to the status quo. They are natural catalysts. Things will change around them.”

Stay the course, dearest,


"When we are together, I am my whole self, open to possibility and change, expansive in my thinking and behavior. I am curious, at play, self-examining in a tender and nurturing way, compassionate towards myself, others, and the world around me. In sum, the sense of vibrant possibility shimmers around our encounters and assignments." - Mary McIntyre, international outdoor writer and photographer

"The power of this process is that as I understand resilience more fully in myself, I am able to see how these ideas can benefit others in my personal and work life and in our community. As I develop, feel, and embody resilience practices, I share this with others with words and by example. In this way, there is a ripple effect of this work, that spreads naturally and effortlessly outward, like the waters of a pristine alpine lake."

- Dr. Melissa Smith, international women's health advocate

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